Responding to your questions
From staying present in hard times to why I share my crazy ass health story to getting started as a writer and beyond
Can you feel the season changing? As I write this, many of you are probably gazing at the sky through special glasses, letting yourself feel small in this big universe.
Today’s my final day in Montana, far from the path of totality with huge fluffy clouds covering the sun. Before I leave, I needed to drop off an IV pump at the local infusion center so as to not be charged two thousand dollars. You know, normal human things. The upside? I get to write from my favorite Bozeman coffee shop (Treeline, on Wallace), the place where a lot of my author career started.
Up at the house, the ground is covered with snow. Down here, the ground is green and the sky is blue, and I can almost see the ghost of my younger self over in the corner typing away at her macbook, choosing to dream.
Today, I’m responding to some of your questions from Instagram.
Recently, I typed up quick answers to questions to pass the 9 hour day of getting IVIG treatment, and I saved some of your deepest questions for later. Of course, as is my norm, my body had different plans for responding than my mind did. 🙃 The day after IVIG—after bragging about how I have only had one infection since starting IVIG over 1.5 years ago—I came down with a cough. (Life loves to humble me.) And then I spent Easter going to urgent care, getting diagnosed with the flu, and being quarantined from my family.
Just as I started to really feel better and was approaching walking again (!!), my body took me backwards. All week, while I coughed and coughed, I remembered this is temporary and when fear shook me late at night or when I couldn’t keep meds down, I asked friends to pray. I tried to trust my body to fight this infection without the help of a hospital.1 And…she did. 😭
So, I’m turning to your questions—late and with a freshly tender heart to how hard being human can be. Here. We. Go.
Most successful way to stay actually present while in the middle of the hard stuff?
If you’ve read my books, then you know I believe paying attention is prayer. I’m a firm believer that there is more goodness shooting up from the ground of our groans and grief than we can notice when our minds are focused on what’s missing.
And you are a human being with a heart that hurts and a body that cannot bear the weight of constant stress. Perhaps the most “successful” way to stay present is to set down the word successful and pick up words like gentler, softer, and accessible. When life is hard, choose softer ways to access strength. Rather than expecting yourself to be able to focus on your emotions and surroundings and physical sensations so.much.constantly., choose one practice to put yourself back in the present moment. This week, for me that looked like queuing up a tapping meditation2 when my mind was jumping to worst-case-scenarios while I tried to fall asleep with the flu. Another gentle choice is to just take a minute to ground yourself by using your senses with the 5-4-3-2-1 method.3
Don’t underestimate the power of the pause. Pause in the middle of hard moments. Find your breath. Breathe in and out, lengthening your exhale to signal to your body that you are safe.4
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Embodied to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.